Tag: Inspiration

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Within

In amidst the madness
Hidden by the chaos
Separate from the order
Beneath the many layers
Through the rambling echoes
Of memory
Imaginary
Or real
Is one particular feeling
That everyone must feel
The rumbling
The churning
The desire
Or the light
The spark for change is there within
And Positivity is in sight


 

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New Year Mark II

January 4th 2018.

New Year’s Day.

Yes. I’m starting again.

Yesterday, I found myself slipping back into my old ways, the ways I want rid of… the ways I want improvement in. I’ve written off yesterday. It didn’t happen. Monday and Tuesday were fine, so they can stay, but my New Year begins again today.

I channelled my Inner Mrs Blotts yesterday and gave myself a Stern telling off. Not just a stern one… no – a Stern one. I was very stern.

(Mrs Blotts, by the way, was my Technical Drawing ‘teacher’ at school. She was one of the teachers who bullied me back then and left a lasting impression on me… only not the type a teacher should really leave. To put it mildly, she was hideous.)

(Mrs Blotts may have warmed to me by the time I’d left school, my Inner Conciliatory Adviser is whispering to me, but I could also just be imagining that to smooth things over. Mrs Blotts made me create the same design two times over after I’d been allocated to her class for a second time, although she marked me with an A+ the first time I did it. A waste of time the second round of ‘lessons’ were. I knew it. And so did Mrs Blotts. When I questioned why I’d been allocated the same course again, she merely snarled ‘Get.On.With.It’. So I did. Without listening. There are only so many ways you can draw a V over a W.)

After I let myself down yesterday, I took myself to one side, and in my finest Mrs Blotts’ voice I said, “You.Idiot.Start.Again.” Whilst pointedly pointing an imaginary finger at myself in an over exaggerated fashion. I was livid. Three days into the new year, and I was living as I had before. This is a new paradigm. A new way of thinking. Time for change and all that – but with me it was business as usual with the same old same ol’.

“No.Internet.For.You.” I/she(it) scolded. “That.Means.No.Blogging.”

(I know how to punish myself, I do.)

“OK” I thought, “I’ll just blog about it the next day. It doesn’t matter.”

Forgive and forget, they say.

I’ve forgiven myself for yesterday now, and everything is rosy and back to normal. New starts do that. Blank canvases do that also. I haven’t forgiven Mrs Blotts, however. No way. Bullies have no place in society and need reminding every now and then just how their actions can have a lasting affect on those who they targeted. Even if the bully ‘turns over a new leaf’. Even if the bully befriends their victim, and they eventually become the best of friends, they were cruel in their actions at the time and that needs to remain on their consciences. I don’t care how they feel about that. They did it. Live.With.It.

Ah.

New Years.

Blank Canvases.

Hehehe.

That brings me to my point of this rather pointless whiney post. I have a blank canvas.

Well… it’s blank for now. That can only mean one thing – yes! I’m feeling that ol’ paintin’ pull. I shall be focussing all of those negative memories from yesteryear and painting them out once and for all. I’m going to create some abstract pieces. Negativity morphed into powerful and positive images that probably won’t make much sense (pretty much like the majority of my blog posts, thinking about it!) but a way to release those bottled up feelings and move on.

It’s time to leave some of the past behind… although that might mean I may have to channel a few more of those bozos through my blog posts to get things started.

Ah well. I’ll keep things positive. It’s the best way to be.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Let’s Feel Good during 2018.

This is my blank canvas… it’s only small but EXTREMELY powerful…


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Wordle: Free Night Flight

Kiss the clouds and fly with me
Merge with my mind – come and see
We’ll relish the light of the silvery Moon
And the sting of the icy raindrops
Shiver and shimmy in the cold night air
Brass monkeys is fine when we’re free up there
Away from crime and grime and time
Strap in hold tight and away we go
We’ll fly so high we’ll find Orion’s Sword
And soar this way and that, chopping and changing
As we feel fit
The flight at night is like a leap of faith
And a free mind is all it takes