Sometimes, days are just plain sailing. Up early(ish), breakfasted, dressed, and out and on with the rest of the day, and in what seems like a flash the day is coming to an end once again.
Most days, it could be said, are generally like that.
Some days, however, are so far removed from the truth, they are, well, unbelievable.
I looked around the large, white, cool lobby in actual awe. I had no idea where I actually was, but knew that I was in actual awe.
Lydia pressed the button for the lift.
โYou need Level Cโ she said, pointing to the elevator door, โand then Room L1. Itโs opposite the elevator when you get out, so you canโt miss it. I have to wait as we are expecting a really special guest to arrive any minute now, and I must wait to meet him here. You can go alone.โ
The door opened as a shrill bell tinged, and she bundled me into the confined space before I had chance to say anything. The door swiftly closed behind me before I could ask if I could take the stairs โ Iโm not too keen on lifts, you see. It was then that I wondered who the special guest could have been… and why was I sent to an official floor in an official building by myself?
I suddenly realised that the lift wasnโt moving, so I pressed the button for Floor C. The lift shuddered and began to move upwards.
Le-Vel Eh. Droned a robotic voice. Le-Vel Bay. It continued. Iโm not very good with accents, but Iโve got the robotic one down to a tee! Le-Vel Say. With another ting, the door slid open, and across the corridor, in front of me, was Room CL1. Plays mend the gop. I looked down, and saw the tiniest of spaces between the floor of the lift and the floor of the corridor; there was absolutely no way I would fall down there. I stepped out of the lift, just as the door swiftly closed once again behind me, making an odd โgopโ sound. A shrill ting, and I then heard the car hum away to wherever.
I stepped across the corridor, and heard a familiar whirring noise. I noticed several CCTV cameras trained upon me. I instantly felt all… โofficialโ.
I knocked on the door, and the familiar voice of Walpole E. Epstein followed a loud buzz and a click.
โCome on in, Tom!โ He bellowed. โI bet you didnโt expect to see me again so soon, did you?โ
As I walked into the room, he was stood just inside the door, arm already outstretched to shake my hand, which I did.
โMr Epstein,โ I started.
โWalpole, please!โ He continued.
โWalpole, could you please tell me whatโs going on? How have I ended up in the USA, when about an hour ago I was in Cheshire, in the UK?โ He was about to speak when I thought of more questions. โHow come everyone knows me? Why is my bathroom some kind of hub? Why was that man giving apples away on the corner… and does he have any more brothers? How did Somerset get a border with Cheshire? What accent was the robot using in the lift? When…โ
โWhoa!โ Walpole laughed hysterically, โSo many questions and so little time!โ He stopped laughing, and glared at me with one of the most sinister stares I have ever experienced. I shrunk. Suddenly, his face went back to normal.
โYes, itโs true that there is an inter-dimensional portal within, beneath and around your bathroom. You helped me to get home from that strange dimension I was stuck in โ thank you very much for that! โ by allowing me to open it, but in doing so, we altered reality around everyone else. I needed your help to get home, which I told you about when we first met. It was this morning for you, but many months ago for me. Weโve been planning this second meeting for quite some time now.โ
โMonths?โ I was starting to feel overdosed with confusion.
โYup!โ Walpole laughed again. โHere, catch!โ he said as he threw something quickly at me. I didnโt react in time and completely missed the object, which turned out to be a tub of my hair gel. โLook familiar?โ
Walpole had walked over to the other side of the office, pointing to a desk in front of a large window. On the desk was another familiar looking object. The shield from the wall in my landing, that I last saw hurtling passed me into the mysterious black hole in my bathroom this morning.
โHow?โ I had completely lost my power of speech.
โWell, Iโm here, arenโt I? You just shook my hand!โ Walpole had walked back over to me and patted me on my right arm. He handed me the shield. โThis is yours, I believe. And this…โ he said, bending to pick up the tub of hair gel.
Now then, how often do you find yourself standing in an office in a foreign country holding one of your own wall ornaments and a tub of hair product and you suddenly realise that you just havenโt got a clue whatโs going on? Not very often? More often than not? Or somewhere in between? Me? I donโt know any more. I decided to go with the flow.
โSo, Walpole, now that all of your planning has come together, and Iโm here, what would you like me to do? And, how did you get me here, for that matter…? I came of my own free will this morning whilst going for a driveโ
โStill more questions…โ Walpole laughed once again. โDo you think the answers will make things any clearer?โ
Walpole looked serious again as he said, โYou followed the signs.โ
Iโm going to leave things here for now, as this post is extremely long once again.
I do hope youโll return for the conclusion…
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