A variation of Six Word Saturday

None of us are getting younger.
Apart from those of us who’re exempt… obviously naming no names here (ahem).

I thought I’d list six words. Six signs of the ageing process.

1. Hair

It goes without saying that hair would be mentioned. It is me doing the mentioning after all, and I haven’t had a hair post in such a long while. It was whilst I was otherwise engaged that I found the inspiration for this post. You see, I’d visited the bathroom at work, and as I was washing my hands, I glanced, nonchalantly, at my reflection in the coloured mirror that makes everyone look as though they’ve been smeared in spray tan. Ignoring the fluorescent orange gargoyle in the reflection, one thing stood out at me. Literally. It actually waved at me. All shiny it was too. A bright white eyebrow, four miles long, pointing forwards, totally out of line with all of the other neatly shaped eyebrow hairs. I tried to flatten it back into shape, but it wouldn’t have it. It wanted to go where it wanted to go. I attempted plucking the little sucker, but it wouldn’t budge. Eventually, with it grasped firmly between forefinger and thumb, and left foot propped up against the sink unit for leverage, it twanged free, with a reverberating twang that echoed all around the bathroom and probably throughout the Kingdom that is United.

Yes, as we get older, hairs start to grow in the most unusual of places. Today the bathroom… tomorrow? Where?

2.  Girth

Ah. Yes. Well, some of us start to spread out a little as we reduce in height. Others remain beanpole thin, but the rest of us turn ever so slightly podgy. We waddle as we walk, have double-chin obstructions as we try to look down, and need a shoe horn just to put on a pair of socks. Running involves walking at the same speed and just moving our arms in a running motion. And we have to come up with novel ways to hide the overhang from our waists just so that others don’t notice that its there. The multiple chins kind of highlights the fact that an overhang may be there, but we have it so well hidden nobody notices.

3. Eyes

The gateway to the soul. Depending on the colour, clear and crisp, dark and broody, or emerald-like and enchanting… looking in. Looking out it’s all misty, foggy and blurred with close-up things having to be moved further away to bring them into focus, and distant things needing to be brought closer for the same thing. The light needs to be right to read black text on a white page, so sometimes a small amount of contortionism needs to take place to get the page in that right light. Not an easy task if one is on the portly side (see word 2 above), and very frustrating if the right light goes out of sight.

4. Fashion

Some of us manage to wear the same things throughout our lives. Others experiment and try different styles, but there’s a fine line between looking good, looking as though one is dressing younger or looking old-fashioned. And there always comes a point when our favourite shirt no longer seems suitable. Maybe its because all of the buttons have twanged off (due to word 2 above), or unsightly hairs protrude through the threads (due to word 1 above), or the colour seems to have lost its lustre (possibly due to word 3 above), or we just think it’s not right and we need to get something else. One word springs to mind here: black. Black always looks good. And the right black can be right flattering too!

5. Music

An oldie but a goodie. This one phrase shows you that you’ve aged when someone says that about your favourite piece of music which sounds as good to you now as it did when you first heard it forty-five years ago. Another sign of the ageing process is singing along to elevator music. Especially when it isn’t playing. And with music, the final sign of the ageing process is when a new piece of music just sounds like noise. I mean to say. Noise?

6. Joints

Yeah, dude… joints!
Not the joints you may be thinking of, however. This word relates to the parts of the body that click… fingers, knees, elbows, neck, spine, toes, jaw, ears, nose, shoulders and brain. Sometimes even walking two steps may leave you hearing the sound of a pod of dolphins chattering around you. When you realise that you are actually in your living room, and there aren’t any dolphins anywhere near, your brain clicks onto the fact that the clicking is actually you. Thinking about it, though, one could become a musical instrument, and provide percussion whilst clicking along (known in the younger days as dancing) to a favourite piece of music (word 5 above). One could push the boat out and wear a groovy little number (word 4 above) as long as it was flowing (word 2) and in bright colours (word 3), and let one’s hair down (or out – word 1). A word of warning, though, if one were to do this. It will be felt for the next three weeks, and the clicking may be considerably louder for a while.

Obviously, this is a general observation.

Not everyone ages in the same way.

I, for example, stopped at twenty-four. (Apart from the odd protruding hair)

Do you have six ageing words? Perhaps you’d like to share below…

I’ve gone slightly over six words…


Posted by Tom Merriman

A future writer living in the present day

43 Comments

  1. Lol. Stopped at 24 eh?! 🤣

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    1. Indeed I did, Jodi. I’ve been that age for umpteen years now. Folk are now starting to disbelieve me… 😉

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  2. I stopped at 7. The End. = 6 words. RESULT! 🤗

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    1. Yay!
      Seven is a good age to stop.
      See? I stopped at seven there, Cobs! 😀

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  3. I can but add comments to your list :
    HAIR – on the pate, varying shades of peacock. I like colour 🙂 Elsewhere , unwanted. Waxed, plucked, lasered.
    GIRTH – ah yes. Shape shifting in and out
    EYES – view through assorted lenses, sometimes misplaced
    FASHION – black is the new orange, green, pink, yellow, blue …..
    MUSIC – definitely soothing, serene soundscape
    JOINTS – creak, creak, creak….

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    1. All very valid additions, Raili! Thank you.
      (I just clicked my finger whilst typing this! – sigh!)

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  4. Have you been following me? Oh, and I do love black.

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    1. Hehehe!
      Just a coincidence I feel, Beverly! 😉

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  5. A great take on six words Tom! Love it 😊

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    1. Thanks, Deb.
      Variety is the spice of life, as they say! 😀

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  6. I would add ‘disbelief’ . . . . disbelief that I can look back on so many years, surely it was only yesterday!

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    1. Oh yes, indeed, Becky!
      I totally get that from my 24 years.
      Ahem.

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      1. And I’m only ’19’!!!!

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        1. 😀
          So it was just yesterday, then! 😀

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  7. Me and my newly-implanted titanium shoulder really enjoyed your post Mr M, I think. I can’t really remember…

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    1. Hehehe. Thanks, Ron. It is Ron., isn’t it? 😉

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  8. I did think that six was a tad optimistic for this subject, Tom. Haven’t whole libraries been written on the subject? I can’t think what you mean about the clicking and creaking! I’ve just come back from zumba 🙂 🙂 Have a fabulous week ahead!

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    1. ZUMBA??? Yikes. Even looking at that makes me want to do one huge click! I’m also planning on writing the history of the world in six words in a few weeks time – I like a challenge! 😀
      And thanks, Jo. You have a great week also.

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    2. I’m with Tom on Zumba, Jo!

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      1. And the history of the world in 6? Nothing venture, nothing gain, hey Tom? 🙂

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        1. Yikes, that’s a big ask!

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          1. Tom’s ambitious 🙂 🙂

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              1. I may not fit the WHOLE history in…

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                1. 😀😀😀😀😀🙄

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          2. I like to challenge myself at times, Sue!

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            1. Well, that’s two of us

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        2. In for a penny in for a pound, Jo! 😀

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  9. I love this post, Tom. I stopped at 30. 1-3-no problem 4. I don’t dress like an 18-year-old but I refuse to dress like an old lady 5. Yes, I love the oldies – long live classic rock and roll 6. I take and sprinkle Tumeric on my food. It seems to work well. We can’t avoid ageing, but we can make the best of it. I feel a lot of it is a mindset.

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    1. Writing this blog keeps me young, Eugenia – and yes, making the most of everything is a great help too! 😀

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  10. Thanks for the giggle this morning…well, late morning here. Another thing that goes with age, the ability to tell proper time. Lol! 😃 I can relate well to your 6 words. I also find myself also talking out loud when no one is around me. This can get embarrassing when in public places… Lol! 😊 Thanks for the smiles today! 😄

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    1. Oh! I do that too, Jill! 😀
      As for time, I’m usually at odds with it as it stands, so I usually guess it incorrectly anyway!
      I’m glad you had a giggle… hope you’re also having a great weekend.

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  11. Headache from laughing…owch…I seem to be the oldest here at 39….😱😸😱😸

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    1. Oops – sorry about that, Samantha!
      (Appearances may be deceptive! 😉 )

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  12. Well, this is a 6++ words post, but hey, it was fun to read. Now…memory, and the frequently disappearing keys/phone/specs….

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    1. Hi Sue… yes, I did slightly break the rules with this one… only slightly, however! 😀
      I’m with you on the memory front – actually I’m with you on the disappearing items front as well! How do we get by???

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  13. oh, this is so exact, and so painfully right. At this point we are a symphony of creaks and gurgles and strange whimpery cries on rising, sitting, all of it. Memory. That’s my biggest worry, The part where you can no longer recall your entire 8th grade class, in order, and frankly you have forgotten most of the highschool teachers–and the senior class is soon to disappear too, even with the help of the year book…

    Put the scissors down, leave the room, and by golly they go too, but not at the same time. An hour later they turn up in the back bedroom, next to the cat. aha, you think, he’s been borrowing them to trim his nails…but a hearty search for them has netted you two pair of glasses, a loafer, your cell phone, and a half finished cup of coffee.

    This ia a wonderful post, Tom, funny but true, all the way.

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  14. Yes Tom, I too am getting old!

    My sight now requires two pairs of spectacles, my mobility is affected and my hair is thinning and won’t grow beyond shoulder length despite not having had it cut for 30 years! 😦

    I also have joint pain and cramps in my hands and my neck clicks when I do something unexpected!

    Still: I am happy, healthy and fed so I’m better off than many! 🙂

    God Bles from the lead singer of Gerry Atrick and The Pacemakers!!! 🙂

    Prenin.

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