Dear Universe,

It’s only me!

I’m having a sideways swipe at things that currently irk me, and wonder if there is anything that you could do about it for me? I’d be ever so grateful, as you know.

Firstly, the roads.

I’m sure you’ve seen me bouncing along on them, ricocheting between potholes. You must be able to feel the pain in my neck that occurs every time the front passenger wheel  hits that rather large pothole. I would imagine this is how whiplash feels, only not as constant. Could you arrange for some roadworks, cones, temporary traffic lights and contraflows so the roads can be resurfaced? That would be wonderful! Thank you.

And while I’m on the subject of pains in the neck, could you do something about the number of dillops who are using the road now? Every time I drive I have some impatient buffoon trying to push me along the road by driving within an inch of my rear bumper. I  know I shouldn’t, but I slow down so they can drive even closer if they wish, but somehow this seems to make them more irritated by me. I do love it when they eventually speed passed me, only to be stopped just ahead by the red traffic light you provide… that’s inspired, that is, Universe!

Oh, and please pass my thanks on to the ‘lady-like’ dillop in the blue car – through a dream perhaps – who flicked two fingers up at me as I drove passed her when she was stuck due to her lane’s traffic light being red and mine green (after she raced passed me earlier) – she gave me a good old chuckle! (Although I somehow don’t think that was her intention)

Next, the weather.

I do love the weather. I really do. I like the sunshine, the rain, the snow, the wind, the hailstone, the thunder and lightning, the fog, everything. But could you please spread them out a little and not provide them all in one day? There’s an old saying that goes:

Don’t cast a clout until May’s out

But we’re now in June and that clout casting still hasn’t started yet!

And thirdly, my television.

As you know, I had to buy myself another television the other day, after my previous one switched off by itself, and as it doesn’t have an on/off switch I couldn’t switch it back on again. I’m happy with my new television, which has surprised me by coming with several High Definition channels which I didn’t know about, but I was also happy with my old one until it took matters into its own hands. I’m not complaining about the television, but asking that you pass a message on to the TV manufacturers that, really, TV sets should still come with an on/off switch, no matter what century we are now living in.

As you can see, I’m mostly happy with things, but there are a just a few areas that could be tidied up a little which would make me even happier.

Oh, and if you aren’t aware, I call any road user who drives in a disrespectful manner a dillop. There are literally hundreds of them on the roads if you need to look for an example. (I may even be a dillop at times, but I can assure you, I’m a really bad example of one!)

Thank you for your time, and I hope you will be able to help me once again.

Kind regards,

Tom.

10 Comments on “Dear Universe,

  1. Boy….My list is far longer than your list TL..! I am glad life is going reasonably well for you 🙂 I can sympathize with you on potholes!!! Winter up where I am leaves the roads a total disaster. You drive at your own risk for sure….It is time for hovercraft to get around. VK

    Liked by 1 person

    • There are a few other things, VK, but I wanted to keep things short. There may be a second letter to follow, you never know!
      Somebody once described the state of the roads as resembling the surface of the Moon… I’d have to disagree, as the Moon is obviously smoother! 😉

      Like

  2. We’ve had road works on my corner of the estate! YIPPEEE!!! – Mostly because we were losing cars in those darned potholes!!! 😦

    There’s one heck of a lot of road problems where I live, but only the absolute desperate ones are being fixed.

    In the days of old when knights were bold and toilets not invented,
    They’d dig a hole in the middle of the road and sit there quite contented!!! 🙂

    God Bless my wonderful friend! 🙂

    Prenin.

    Like

  3. A dillop nearly ran me off the road today, Tom. I hope Universe is listening very carefully. There are so many careless people and, for some reason, they are always in such a terrible hurry, aren’t they? We could use some breezes this way, although it cooled off a bit here. Whew! We’ve already hit the triple digits.

    Like

    • Yikes, Amy! For the temperatures and the dillop!
      And you’re right… if they slowed down a little they may be a little less careless. Ideally, anyway…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. “Dillop” is such a perfect word! I’m lucky to be able to drive mostly on the main thoroughfares during off-peak hours, so I encounter relatively few of them… but it’s good to have a name for them when I meet one!

    Like

    • I’m so envious, Diane. They even put traffic lights up here in places just to make the roads busier to encourage the dillops. It’s like an uphill battle at times!
      But yes, I think the word fits nicely.

      Like

    • Oh it is, Icewolf… listening, acting and possibly laughing!
      Laughter’s good though… well it’s one way to Feel Good, anyway! 😀

      Like

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