Growing Old Gracefully?


Do people grow old gracefully? Or is this question just a nice thought for an ideal world?

I see some ‘old’ people who are happy to be very gracious, grateful for everything, pleasant to be around, always have a kind word to say and nothing is too much trouble.
I see others who enjoy to grumble about the weather, the ‘young’ people, the state of the economy, the government, opinions, the weather again, food, health, and basically anything and everything else as well.
There are others who like to do their own thing, like the road-raged lunatic (my thoughts at the time… or possibly
Fred Mark II’s thoughts) who was so intent on trying to get passed me in his Volvo earlier and realised he couldn’t pass on one side, so sped passed the other… only to drive on at normal speed once he was passed. When I glanced at the driver I was shocked to see it was an older ‘gentleman’ who presumably thought he was in a hurry and changed his mind. (Other car makes are available)
Still, there are others who dance like they are in their teens with precise grace and elegance. Those who sing word perfectly, and in perfect tune. And those who are sprightly well into their nineties and even their hundreds.

After my little incident on the road, I saw a trio of skateboarders on the pavement skating towards me. When I got closer to them, I thought that their combined age must have been around 105. Now, I’m not very good at guessing folk’s ages, but these three were no spring chickens. They were well out of their teenage years. And presumably well out of their twenties also. They were dressed like typical skater boys… long hair, jeans around their knees with their bloomers on show, and tight tee shirts with holes in them. If they didn’t look so old they’d have probably looked the part.

Is it just me, or are more and more people not ‘acting’ the age they ‘should’ be?

There was that man yesterday who didn’t act his age when he went to splatter that newspaperman with a custard pie. Unfortunately for the pie-man, the newspaperman’s young wife acted older than her years appeared to be, and rose to her husband’s defence.

There was that woman in her seventies a couple of months ago who super-sped across a busy high street to foil a robbery by clobbering the would-be jewellery thieves with her handbag.

There was that middle-aged woman who acted as though she was three by putting that cat into the rubbish bin last year.

And, there was that woman who won an international dancing competition by being flung all over the place by her dance partner, who didn’t seem to be aware that this woman was in her seventies.

I hope that when I reach these types of ages, I’m ‘enjoying’ myself as much as they are (obviously ignoring the cat woman and road-rage man, and possibly the pie-man, but sometimes, I must admit, that I think of someone who I’d love to custard pie!).

Seriously, though… I don’t think it matters how we act, whatever our age, as long as we are enjoying ourselves and not causing any pain / discomfort to anyone else. Embarrassment is another issue entirely, and why should one person’s actions cause embarrassment to another who isn’t doing them anyway? I used to always feel embarrassed for other people, until I realised that my thoughts didn’t really matter, and those people continued doing what they were doing anyway.

A short while ago, I learned a ‘phrase’ that sums things up nicely. If I have a problem with someone, it is my problem to solve, not their’s. Likewise, if they have a problem with me, this is their problem to solve and not mine. We can’t go around changing ourselves for everyone!

Janet Street-Porter once said ‘a third of the people will like you; a third of the people will never like you; and the final third may or may not like you, depending on whatever you do. So, chances are up to two thirds of the people are going to like you anyway, so there is no point trying to be different.’ Or something like that.

So, act your age or don’t… the choice is yours! We are all as old as we feel anyway.

After all, it is how we feel that matters most!

As I constantly feel good, I tell myself I feel young too! In my mind, I am young anyway. I sometimes moan like I’m ‘older’; but I still have my youth within!

8 responses to “Growing Old Gracefully?”

  1. blackwatertown avatar
    blackwatertown

    Good advice – even that from JSP.
    I’ll add, don’t spend too much time in front of mirrors in case the reality undermines the picture of yourself in your mind’s eye.

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    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Thank you… and great tip about the mirrors. I use a dull light…

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  2. beautifulchaos2 avatar

    Hi Tom,
    What a wonderful post this is. I completely agree with your thoughts on this, it really only matters that we act in a way that makes us happy and that feels good to us, this is what keeps people youthful, to act “old” to comply with other peoples expectations of what one should act like according ot their biological age is just wrong and probably only makes us grow old faster.
    Hugs, Nikki

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    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Hi Nikki, and thanks!
      We can’t be ourselves if we are doing what others want us to, can we? Age is really just a number! 🙂

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  3. penpusherpen avatar

    I agree with Nikki, Sir Aquatom, somehow age is perceived as being ‘this’ way and definitely not ‘that’ way, I think there’s no ‘age’ for acceptance of joining the Old Age Club, it’s your state of mind (sometimes I feel so much like a teenager it surprises me when someone takes me seriously. ) and how you personally feel inside… I’m not saying it’s good to stand and wail ‘I want that toy’ or ‘I want to go home’ at work whilst stamping your feet, oh no siree, ‘twould cause havoc… but now and again a letting go of the ‘adult;’ in you could work wonders… Stress is a killer, and I can think of nothing more stressful than thinking ‘strewth I’m getting older, should I act my age?’ … As ‘they’ say, you’re as young as you feel…. (I won’t do the follow on joke!! 😉 ) xPenx

    PS/ Can’t stand Janet Street Pawter. (deliberate misspelling) … sometimes I want to slap her face…don’t know why, a failing in me I suppose….x

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    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Hi, Pen! We can’t all like the same people – that’s almost the same as acting a certain way when we are of a certain age… in a previous job, they brought us all toys in one day, and I’m sure the stress levels rose. Most people wanted one of the toys in particular and couldn’t have it because someone else nabbed it first. I played on my toy piano… none of us acted our ages that day!

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      1. penpusherpen avatar

        sorry, nearly fell off my chair… toy piano eh? … as a child I wanted a Xylophone, (is that spelt right? … and spellchecker hates Spelt? …. is there such a word or has my mind come up with it? I am doubting myself now… Yikes!! ) xPenx

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        1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

          Yep, a piano… and I made a racket with it too (I can’t play, you know?)
          Xylophone looks right to me, and spelt is right too; those wavy lines tend to put you off…

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