Emergency Smalls

I wouldn’t say that I am the type of person who leaves everything to the last minute. I leave quite a lot of things, but not everything.

I mean, why do today what can be put off until tomorrow? Right?

Only, that phrase comes with a slight flaw. Several slight flaws actually.

SLIGHT FLAW NUMBER ONE
If I put off driving to work until the next day, I’d never get there. So, instantly, the logic falls flat here. OK, I know that I could walk instead, but a little voice is saying why walk when there is a perfectly good car there? And besides, if I was to walk, due to the lack of exercise I have had lately, it would probably take me until tomorrow to walk there anyway.

SLIGHT FLAW NUMBER TWO
I could never put food off until tomorrow.

SLIGHT FLAW NUMBER THREE
Laundry. Clothes washing. This needs to be done when it needs to be done. No ifs. No buts.

Which brings me to the point of this post.

I’ve, kind of, left my smalls washing to the very last minute. Extremely last minute. As in just finished now and I hope they are dry for tomorrow last minute. I mean, they should be, but what if they aren’t?

I have them airing in the warmest and most airy room in the Mansion, so they should be dry, but if not, everything isn’t lost.

No, not at all.

I have my emergency smalls supply at hand.

The last time I was in an emergency situation such as this was back in 1995, and everything was fine. The day passed without incident, and normal smalls wear was resumed the very next day.

This time around shouldn’t cause any issues either.

Unless, the emergency smalls chest is holding the ‘other’ smalls. The holey ones. If this is the case, the word ‘smalls’ would also be an infringement of the trades descriptions act (or the clothing equivalent) – I’ve seen smaller king-size bed sheets.

I daren’t look in the chest just now. I’ll wait to see if everything is dry in the morning. If not, there’s still three choices:

SMALL CHOICE NUMBER ONE
Large smalls

SMALL CHOICE NUMBER TWO
Damp smalls

SMALL CHOICE NUMBER THREE
No smalls

But, as in any emergency situation: Keep calm and carry on.

17 thoughts on “Emergency Smalls

  1. With you on this one Tom! 🙂

    I keep two packs of new smalls tucked away in case of emergency – now I am losing weight they will probably fit again! 🙂

    Have a great week my friend! 🙂

    Prenin.

    Like

  2. If you’re like many guys, you may have a fourth option: small smalls. Dig deep. Into that box you packed when you moved away from home for the first time. Yes, the one you’ve faithfully brought with you through every subsequent move but never quite gotten around to unpacking… 🙂

    Like

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