The Elite Force of Britain, a group of superheroes who banded together for the good of all. A group of superheroes missing for a while. A group of superheroes shocked after hearing terrible news regarding one of their friends. A group of superheroes who find the real truth within a social media chat on their internal private streams of the übersite, UMetroNetworkMediaK, or UMNMK for short. Adapted to the team’s needs, the site itself is impenetrable to outside sources, however a slight hick up with the operating system caused part of the conversation to be broadcast worldwide…

The Firetop:
I can’t believe any of you would do such a thing

Lycralad:
Hi Firetop. What’s going on?
The Firetop:
You pick the right time to go on holiday, buddy.
Lycralad:
You were away too… but why? What have I missed this time?
The Firetop:
Nothing much really – only this bunch of idiots getting Parrot Girl killed
Lycralad:
What? NO. When? How? What happened? OMG Surprised smile
The Firetop:
Last week. They sent her after Simba Katiya and she through her under a lorry. She isn’t even part of the team.

auto-correct has automatically corrected the spelling of the word threw to through
BettyStretch246:
Just joining, guys. Is it true? I don’t believe it.
Psychic Sue:
Please, all, remain calm.
BettyStretch246:
Psychic Sue – how can you ask us to remain calm. This isn’t right.
Psychic Sue:
It isn’t, Betty. Please all, remain calm.
BettyStretch246:
Well, you are the current team leader. But you must tell us what has happened. We – and especially Firetop – deserve to know. And I’m so glad thet Viridian managed to fix that ridiculous text limitation thing on this platform. That was so infuriating

auto-correct suggests they; them, that; this; tibet; thermoluminescence
Psychic Sue:
Indeed. He now needs to work on the spell checker.
BettyStretch246:
OK. He’ll do that. But… Parrot Girl? What happened?
Psychic Sue:
As we were travelling around the world (or on holiday, Lycralad Winking smile) both recruiting for our international team and thwarting most of the plans Supervillains United and their international associates were attempting, we needed undercover support here in the UK. So we called upon Parrot Girl and a few others for help. And, they were all willing to assist.
The Firetop:
I don’t think she was willing to be sent to her doom, Sue.
The Crimson Songbird:
None of us are willing for that, Firetop. Sorry, I’ve just joined in the chat. We aren’t willing for it, but as superheroes we have to be prepared for it – for any eventuality, in fact. Like the time we were lost in time. The important thing is getting through and making things count.
Icewind:
Hello, Elite Force of Britain. May I introduce myself?
The Crimson Songbird:
This is a secure channel, ‘Icewind’. How have you gained access to here?
Icewind:
I have full clearance, my friend Crimson Songbird. I have full access rights as do all current EFB mambers. This was granted to me by your team leader. And I am not the only one.

auto-correct suggests mambo number five
The Crimson Songbird:
Psychic Sue? Is thi true? I suppose it must be – but why? And isn’t this something we shovel all be aware of in advance?

auto-correct suggests chi
auto-correct has automatically corrected the word shoul to shovel
Icewind:
I agree that you should have known before I simply joined the chat, but we have to speak to you all now. Answers will be provided, you will see. And yes, auto-correct does need looking at.
Simba Katiya:
I think seeing my presence here will no doubt shock and annoy you. Deception was a necessity in this case, team. I make no apologies for that.
The Firetop:
You certainly have no right to be here, witch. You are a thief and now a murderess. I’ve activated the auto-tracker to locate Simba Katiya. I can’t believe this

auto-correct has automatically corrected the word auto-tracjer to auto-tracker
auto-tracker has been initiated. location detection protocol initiated. analysing…
The Crimson Songbird:
Psychic Sue would never give access to a super criminal, Simba Katiya. We are tracking you. Keep strong, Firetop.
Simba Katiya:
Please do (track me and keep strong). We are at the newly discovered headquarters of Supervillains United. They were holding their recruitment open day, and supervillains from all across the globe have turned up to find out if they had made it onto the team. Needless to say we have rounded them up. Each and every one of them! Open-mouthed smile
PaRRotGirl-official:
Hi guys! It’s me… Parrot Girl! And not my ghost either! I agreed to be bait to lull the supervillains into a false sense of security about Simba – she’s a goodie, really. And a really good goodie to boot!
Simba Katiya:
Just doing what I had to, PG. You took more of a risk than I did.
PaRRotGirl-official:
I just played a part. You put your whole reputation on the line to help the team –and the world! The rest of us thank you for that – and I’m sure once Firetop calms down and allows the bigger picture to sink in, he will see that aswell.

auto-correct suggests aslan
The Firetop:
I’m starting to – but I’m feeling a little let down. It’s a trust thing. We need trust in the team to work properly. We need trust in the relationship. I don’t know what I’m thinking. I’m all over the place. Good to see you, babe, but. Ah. I think we need a chat later.
Simba Katiya:
Being a superhero isn’t always about the good and the glory, Firetop – I’m sure you understand that. Parrot Girl did what was needed to ensure the ultimate success in the mission, and that we all achieved. The more who knew the less chance we had. I know you get that.

 

The Firetop:
I do. I do. it was just too close this time. Way too close.
BettyStretch246:
We all felt it, Firetop. There’s nothing to say this kind of mission won’t crop up again in the future. We have to be prepared to know that sometimes things are happening that we aren’t meant to be privy to. It seems a lot untrusting, though.
Muriel Magnificent:
Hi team. I disagree, Betty. With the threats we come up against these days, mind readers and body watchers will be able to detect our plans even before we’ve come up with them. Major cases and missions such as this one should be kept top secret – even to the rest of the team. For all we know another top secret mission could be taking place right now, outside of our knowledge. Oh, I do love this new interface, where I can type without all that didiculous stopping and starting

auto-correct suggests diplodocus
Viridian:
I’m pleased to see the new platform working correctly. I’m working on auto-correct to have a lot more functionality than what it currently has. Wait and see, guys. It is good to see you Parrot Girl… and good to see you again, Simba.
The Stealth Gent:
As usual, I’mlate to the chat. Sounds like a good deception to me.

error: auto-correct has no suggestion to make
The Green Gladiator:
I’ve just got here too, Stealth. I think a need to know basis is good, but we should be made aware of any such events taking place in the future – even if it is just a little nod to say somethings going on within the team.
PaRRotGirl-official:
Ah, but this time, Green, it wasn’t the team. Simba Katiya, me, Angel Change, Icewind, Raydarr and Felyne all agreed to join together on Psychic Sue’s request. Sue kept everyone else out of the loop completely in two ways – by sending everyone overseas and by blocking any clues from entering the minds of the team. It was needed to be done, and I would do it again in the future if needed.
Lycralad:
I don’t know why you don’t just join the team, Parrots… you work well within a team. Any team.
Muriel Magnificent:
I’ll second that if it’s a nomination, Lycra Lad. In fact, I’ll nomintae you all for EFB membership

auto-correct suggests nominate; nominal
Angel Change:
As a nod, as Green Gladiator requested, some of us already may be…
The Crimson Songbird:
Intruiging. Hello Angel Change. Could I just point out the obvious, however. We now know something was ging on; and an external team have been broght in tocreate a distraction to enable the entire SVU o be catured, but what has actually happened? How did Parrt Girl being hit by a lorry result in the SVU being caught? How did bot simna and Parrot girl know parrots wouldn’t be hurt by the lorry? And who are Raydarr and Felyne?

auto-correct suggests intriguing
auto-correct suggests ginger; going; grinch; gyrating; gesticulating
auto-correct suggests brought
error: auto-correct has no suggestion to make
error: auto-correct has no suggestion to make
auto-correct suggests captured
auto-correct suggests parror
auto-correct has automatically corrected the word lorre to lorry
error; auto-correct suggests simba;;;
auto-correct has crashed due to a cross communication conflict with the location detection protocol; auto-tracker has detected its target but database resources have returned an internal error. An external infringement violation has been detected, automatic shutdown and lockout protocols initiated.
auto-correct suggests manual override needed
auto-correct is now closing down all communication channels

The Superhero Diaries will return some time next year


 

Posted by Tom Merriman

A future writer living in the present day

10 Comments

  1. Good grief…your artistic imagination is out of control. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thanks, Beverly. With these Superhero Diaries posts, I fall back on this format quite a bit – this is the third one now! 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  2. Good Grief! A wikisuperleaks

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. I know, Raili. Shocking, isn’t it?!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  3. Crikey!
    There’s a playground inside your head and I do believe we’re seeing only a tiny portion of it! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Cobs, you are right about the playground being there, within my head… but you haven’t mentioned the entire Universe that surrounds the playground!
      The thing is, I’m only seeing portions of it at a time as well…

      Like

      Reply

  4. Wowsa! This is brilliant.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thanks, Eugenia. I like creating this type of post.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  5. Nice one Tom – you have a remarkable mind!!! 🙂

    God Bless!

    Prenin.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thanks, Prenin. It does have its uses at times…

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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