Soul searching certainly throws in some dramatic curve balls!
Already I have two important aspects about myself that I need to change in order to move forward. The first is regarding my health, although, in actual fact both things relate to this.
I am overweight. Extremely overweight. I’ve known I’ve been overweight for a while, but carried on doing what I usually do just expecting things to miraculously change… but in reality that isn’t going to happen. I have to make changes and take action to bring that side of my life under control.
It took one unflattering photo (a Selfie – and I know I take terrible Selfies, but this one was a humdinger! My neck and chins rolled around on my chest and up around my jaw and cheeks. Yes, I took the Selfie lay on the bed, head propped forward on a pillow, and at the time somehow thought it may be flattering. How wrong was I!) that made me think ooh. And then, this evening, I stepped onto the scales and then stepped off them. Fortunately, there were just enough numbers for the arrow to reach – but only just!
My soul prodded me to take the photo. And my soul prodded me to step onto the scales. My soul was telling me “Look, how can you live like this? You need to take things in order, so we can all share the body for many years to come.” With all, he was referring to me, my mind and my soul. And he made perfect sense.
It wasn’t to shame me into doing anything, but the opposite. It was a gentle nudge to get started and move things forward. He also prompted me to write this post about it – sharing sets the wheels in motion.
The second important aspect is where I live (the Mansion). Currently, it’s very cluttered, full of boxes full of items from when my Mum and brother passed away last year; boxes I haven’t really been able to think about looking in, let alone moving out. But, as my soul says, it has to be done. A cluttered home is no good for mind, body or soul, and the souls of my family members wouldn’t want me to keep everything that I don’t need to keep. Be kind, he says, remember them, but be ruthless.
One further aspect that I need to do to move forward is to find it in myself to respect myself and allow myself to love myself more. I have a fabulous imagination which takes me to many a surreal place, but I need to do something more with my reality. All of the people I knew (apart from those I work with and extended family – and Blogland, of course!) are now in my past. I can’t bring them back, and keeping hold of boxes of their items isn’t going to do that. Their memories live on within me, and I need to make more external space around me so I can fill it now with others to help me to move forward. That was a harsh jolt, I don’t mind admitting, but again it was highlighted to me in a gentle way.
So, moving forward, I need to shrink (literally!) and then create space around me to enable me to grow further.
Slowly does it.
Who knows what lies ahead? But by taking more care of myself now, my future is already looking brighter. Everything begins within. Start with me, and then allow my bright light to shine outwards even brighter. I have a bright light to share, and the more confidence I feel within myself, the more confidence will radiate outwards.
I’ll be doing a lot more soul searching over the next few days. I may have a few more gentle nudges about other areas of my life that need tweaking. I may post them, I may not – that really depends on how my soul feels about it.
But for now, my soul Feels Good. And that means I Feel Good also. I’m taking action, and making changes. To the outside world, they’re probably just ‘so what?!’, but to me, they are major MAJOR steps. It’s time for me to move forward.
(This wasn’t the post I intended to post today, but I just went with the flow.)