Soul searching certainly throws in some dramatic curve balls!

Already I have two important aspects about myself that I need to change in order to move forward. The first is regarding my health, although, in actual fact both things relate to this.

I am overweight. Extremely overweight. I’ve known I’ve been overweight for a while, but carried on doing what I usually do just expecting things to miraculously change… but in reality that isn’t going to happen. I have to make changes and take action to bring that side of my life under control.

It took one unflattering photo (a Selfie – and I know I take terrible Selfies, but this one was a humdinger! My neck and chins rolled around on my chest and up around my jaw and cheeks. Yes, I took the Selfie lay on the bed, head propped forward on a pillow, and at the time somehow thought it may be flattering. How wrong was I!) that made me think ooh. And then, this evening, I stepped onto the scales and then stepped off them. Fortunately, there were just enough numbers for the arrow to reach – but only just!

My soul prodded me to take the photo. And my soul prodded me to step onto the scales. My soul was telling me “Look, how can you live like this? You need to take things in order, so we can all share the body for many years to come.” With all, he was referring to me, my mind and my soul. And he made perfect sense.

It wasn’t to shame me into doing anything, but the opposite. It was a gentle nudge to get started and move things forward. He also prompted me to write this post about it – sharing sets the wheels in motion.

The second important aspect is where I live (the Mansion). Currently, it’s very cluttered, full of boxes full of items from when my Mum and brother passed away last year; boxes I haven’t really been able to think about looking in, let alone moving out. But, as my soul says, it has to be done. A cluttered home is no good for mind, body or soul, and the souls of my family members wouldn’t want me to keep everything that I don’t need to keep. Be kind, he says, remember them, but be ruthless.

One further aspect that I need to do to move forward is to find it in myself to respect myself and allow myself to love myself more. I have a fabulous imagination which takes me to many a surreal place, but I need to do something more with my reality. All of the people I knew (apart from those I work with and extended family – and Blogland, of course!) are now in my past. I can’t bring them back, and keeping hold of boxes of their items isn’t going to do that. Their memories live on within me, and I need to make more external space around me so I can fill it now with others to help me to move forward. That was a harsh jolt, I don’t mind admitting, but again it was highlighted to me in a gentle way.

So, moving forward, I need to shrink (literally!) and then create space around me to enable me to grow further.

Slowly does it.

Who knows what lies ahead? But by taking more care of myself now, my future is already looking brighter. Everything begins within. Start with me, and then allow my bright light to shine outwards even brighter. I have a bright light to share, and the more confidence I feel within myself, the more confidence will radiate outwards.

I’ll be doing a lot more soul searching over the next few days. I may have a few more gentle nudges about other areas of my life that need tweaking. I may post them, I may not – that really depends on how my soul feels about it.

But for now, my soul Feels Good. And that means I Feel Good also. I’m taking action, and making changes. To the outside world, they’re probably just ‘so what?!’, but to me, they are major MAJOR steps. It’s time for me to move forward.

(This wasn’t the post I intended to post today, but I just went with the flow.)

38 thoughts

    1. 😀 Thanks, CM. You’ll probably not believe the amount of prods I’ve received to get to this point, but I’m here now… and I will do it!

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  1. All kudos to you Tom, I have ever confidence in you achieving your goals, your mum would have been proud of you. Be kind to yourself don’t rush things each small step will eventually take you to your goals. ….. oh and let me tell you nobody can take a flattering photograph in a laid down position 🫣😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha! I was always under the impression that taking a Selfie from above was more flattering… obviously not! 🤣
      And thank you, Elaine. Making these changes feels right, and I can feel my Mum smiling as I write that.
      I’m looking forward to seeing what other areas come into focus as I look deeper… if now isn’t the right time to change, when will it be?
      And by making these changes, I am being kind to myself. It’s all good!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Oh what a journey you are on…Being aware of yourself is so important to really know yourself. So glad you are figuring out where to go next. I think you’ll feel better about you and your health more and more everyday. Stay the course TL and you’ll reap your rewards….It’s worth it! Good going!!!! VK

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    1. Thank you, VK. You did say the other day that this journey is a doozy! Knowing now what I have to do is already making me feel lighter, and I’m sure I’ll be lighter still over the next few days. I intend to reap those rewards, and more! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

        1. 🤣 It’ll be a few weeks yet until I reach the blowing away stage, VK, and hopefully by that time I’ll have a stronger footing and be more grounded. But as of right now, I feel ready to soar! 🙂

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  3. Going with the Flow Tom is the first great step… Posting your sincere personal thoughts takes courage, that is another step… Opening up your grief and seeing the need to let go what you have not been able to face is yet another step…. And knowing you have to make changes in how your perceive yourself is another huge leap ..

    In fact Tom I would say you have made a grand Step on the way Forward my friend… And you know what I am sure there are many more of here all in the wings willing you on and encouraging you to make space to be YOU…
    We love you dear Tom.. You make us all laugh, smile, and you take that lighter look at life encouraging us all..

    Now is the time to Deep Dive into you and do things for you…

    When I set about healing my own Life Tom.. I had had a nervous breakdown… I was a wreck… on tablets for depression.. I had a number of health issues… I was the opposite in weight.. at one point I was 6 and a half stone in weight a skeleton.
    I wouldn’t eat… To get myself to eat.. I would make from scratch a rice pudding every day…. and make myself eat it… It became a ritual that I had to do…
    Lots of other things I eventually healed…. including a chronic illness of Fibromyalgia which doctors just gave addictive painkillers which I eventually threw away.. Like I said in my recent post.. It didn’t happen over night..
    And there will be days when its hard…
    But we take things one step, one day at a time…. Setting our intentions is a major thing.. and you couldn’t start it at a better time planetary wise..

    You have indeed made a start and yes slowly does it…. Slow but sure is always the way….
    I am so proud of you Tom…. and thank you for taking that first courageous step in setting your intention with us who are your friends here on WP…
    You can do this…
    Much love your way Tom 💚

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Sue. You’ve helped me to look deeper and pay more attention to myself. We have to do that really, otherwise we’ll remain stuck as we are and never become the best version of who we should be. I think I’ll be doing a few rituals of my own over the next few weeks, anything to realign myself.
      Thank you for all your help, Sue. 🙂

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      1. The book You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay is very good also Tom… Lots of self loving affirmations in there which I did a lot of..
        Also Mirror work…. Looking at myself full face in the mirror and telling myself I loved myself…. putting stickers everywhere to remind me of affirmations too…. ❤
        You are very welcome 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Yes, I own that book too, Sue, although I haven’t read it for a couple of years. I like the mirror work as well… that makes spotting anything with a mirrored surface fun! 😄

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        1. 🤣🤣 Ah! Now I see why you laughed, Sue. Right time, right place… that message was meant to reach me, obviously, and also to give you a chuckle.
          I love it when the Universe plays with us like this! 😄🤣

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  4. Dear Tom, this was very touching, and I’m so glad you posted it. So many of us struggle with body image and weight issues. And I’m so sorry for the loss of your brother and mother last year–must have been hard, a double-whammy. I’m overweight too, and have diabetes–but dieting just wasn’t going to happen for me. I did make some changes–quit drinking Diet Coke, and only have sparkling water (flavored with lovely essences–brand name, La Croix). And the occasional juice. But just hydrating my body with healthy and tasty water has made a huge difference in how I feel. I’ve also tried to cut back on bad snacks…carbs (chips are gone, but I still eat cheese crackers!); and I’m better (not perfect) about saying no to sugary desserts. I’m also trying to eat less meat, more veggies–and I love beans of almost any variety, so I get plenty of protein! As you’ve said, “just go slow, and be kind and patient with yourself”.

    As far as dealing with boxes full of sentimental things–I’ll be honest: you are blessed to have had loving family members who were truly a loss to you. (And you can take your time with the boxes.) There’s a different grief when you lose people with whom there was no love, no connection whatsoever. I don’t have any grief, no feelings at all, just emptiness–and not a single item, let alone a box full, to remind me of those I grew up with.

    Okay, I’ve taken up way to much space in your comment box! Just know that I keep you in my thoughts and prayers–and I support the efforts you’re making toward a healthier lifestyle. You can do it!!! Leslie💙

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Leslie. A bit of work ahead, but it’s going to be fun. And any improvement, no matter how small, is still an improvement, right? 🙂 You’ve made some changes to your diet, so it has to be good!

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Exactly! A brilliant motto! There’s no point missing the view whilst I’m heading toward my destination, is there? Small steps, greater changes! 🙂

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  5. Tom,
    yesterday I wrote at Clark’s post :
    “…the nature of the catalyst facilitating the reaction between dream and manifested reality, is of an unexpected quality-in essence and in time of occurrence.”
    Yes, it can very well be a selfie!

    Sue (above) summed it up so well, that me repeating (what you should know by now) would be a waste of your time.
    But let me repeat the credo of our band of brothers & sisters at the SSC&B:
    We leave our own neither behind ,nor alone.

    Walk on your day, proudly.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 😀 Thanks, Nick! 😀
      Coincidences and synchronicities are appearing regularly at the moment – I love it! It’s as though there’s something in the air! 😁

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Good for you, Tom! You’ve been through a lot in the past year, so I’m glad you’re being kind to yourself while taking steps forward. Now that your soul has said, “It’s time”, I know you’ll be able to achieve your goals slowly, but steadily. I hope you’ll continue to be kind to yourself during the ups and downs – no progress is ever a straight line, but you’ll get there! And you’ll Feel Good along the way. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Diane… and yes I will (Feel Good, that is!). I just need to be open to other changes that present themselves to me as well as making changes for myself. I’ll get there. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Icewolf. Things are moving and changing, and I Feel Good with what’s happening so far. Still a bit further to go, though, but I feel lighter already! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Good to see your smile today Tom…. and happy to see you my friend.. And hope all is well with you and you have been enjoying the balmy days of Summer and Early Autumn… Keep that Feel Good Factor my friend… Much love your way 🙂 💛

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