Binfire Night


This keyboard of mine likes to play tricks on my mind. My mind likes to play tricks on my mind, too, but today, it is the keyboard’s turn.

I’ve finally (at least I think!) caught up with the latest blog posts that I follow, ready for me to fall dramatically behind again over the next day or so. It’s all fun, though, and catching up is good when it isn’t rushed. After my little trip the other day, I’ve slowed down my rushing considerably, but I’m still receiving messages telling me to slow down even further. I don’t think I’m rushing half as much now, and maybe I’ve slowed down a little quicker than the Universe anticipated that I would and there are still a few messages waiting to get through to me. A little like the text messages that are sent at midnight on New Year’s Eve and don’t arrive until June 6th, but on a far grander scale.

During my blog visits today, I have left a couple of comments here and there, but nowhere near as many as I would have liked to have done (sorry about that, fellow Blogees (should this have a double G?) out in Blogland!). For each comment that I typed, my keyboard provided some pretty fun typographical errors. The fact that I was typing in the dark might have made the keyboard’s job a little more difficult (it is wireless), but my fingers were definitely hitting the correct keys in the correct order.

There was a BBC situation comedy that ran for several decades (one decade in reality and hundreds of others on satellite TV stations) called ‘Allo ‘Allo, which was set in France during World War Two. France was occupied, and, if my memory serves me right, they needed help from the English. The British actors who were portraying the French people had to speak their lines with a French accent. The same was for other nationalities that were represented, Italian accents for the Italian characters, German accents for the German characters etc., but when it came to the English it was slightly different. The English characters, being in France, couldn’t speak French very well, and their spoken comments came across as my typed comments did before I amended them accordingly. For example, that last sentence, in ‘Allo ‘Allo speak, would have read something like Zee English carrot ears, boeing on France, could nit spoke English vary wool, and seer spook on cam mints came across as my toped cam mints be far I a mend add sum a code in glee. Anyway, I digress.

Bonfire Night last night was a banging, whizzing, flashing, noisy affair, until I realised that I had my volume up too high on the TV. I lowered the volume slightly and could then hear the fireworks outsode.

A little later, I heard a different kind of commotion outside. Shouting. A strange whirring noise. An engine being revved. I glanced out of the window, and could just make out in the road beyond the park that backs on to Aquatom Mansion, the flashing blue lights of a fire engine. Torches were being shone in every direction imaginable, one shone directly on to me, and I had to dash behind the curtains before I was spotted. Not that I’m nosy, I hasten to add, but at times I like to keep up with what’s going on (OK, sometimes I’m nosy!) The smoke from all of the bonfires in the area caused the beams of light from the torches to cast eerie glows as they cut through the illuminated greyness, which also pulsed bluely from the lights on the fire engine.

I could make out that the cause of the commotion was a rubbish bin. I don’t know if it was a stray firework that caused the fire, or someone had set it alight intentionally, but the fire crew had the blaze under control in no time at all. I couldn’t help but think that last night, of all nights, the last thing the fire services needed to deal with was a bin fire amid all of the bonfires.

And, yes, I typed the title to this post incorrectly. Or rather, the keyboard did. Originally, it read ‘Bonfire Night’, which although technically correct, it wouldn’t have made any real sense to the post at all… and this is where my mind starts to play tricks on me. Have I written a post that actually makes sense? No, I couldn’t hive…

28 responses to “Binfire Night”

  1. prenin avatar

    Sounds like your wireless keyboard Noods Nuw Botteries!!! LoL!!!

    Yeah we had a quiet night arson wise – there was a period when setting fire to cars was the local entertainment – but you can bet the bin fire wasn’t accidental…

    Thanks for the visit and comment Tom – I Pray you win the big one my friend and that it enriches your life as my £2.90 enriches my news agent… LoL!!!

    God Bless my friend!

    Prenin.

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      You may be right, Prenin, but it is providing me with hours of fun! 😀
      You may be right with the fire too, but I still like to think that it may have been accidental…
      Oh, and the Lottery win… I’ve been regularly winning £2.50 recently which is looking promising… although your £2.90 has beat that! You just never know, do you?
      Thanks for visiting and commenting, Prenin! 😀

      Like

  2. kateshrewsday avatar

    LOVE the pun, Tom 🙂

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Thanks, Kate, and I apologise at the same time…

      Like

  3. Tilly Bud avatar

    Leesten vairy carefully; I vill zay zis only vonce: great post!

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Ha ha Tilly…Sank you vairy much! 😀

      Like

  4. penpusherpen avatar

    ah this one spoke to me….Sir Aquatom, for I am the uncrowned Queen of the mistyped word… um…or should I say … my keyboard is crackers, as an excuse?… 😉 (or mayhap my keyboard has cracker crumbs in it? …) either way…I really enjoyed reading this…not to say I don’t usually enjoy your…..um.. I shall take my keyboard and high tail it… (I checked out Google.., for the correct spelling or otherwise of Blogees, and it came up with BeeGees?.. 😉 ) … Which is strange, ‘cos one of their backing Bass Guitarists lives next door … (Robins that is. I don’t know if Wayne backed the whole group…but he did mention Robin Gibb…and now he’s built an extension for his session playing.. (Wayne not Robin) .. and he says it’s sound proofed…but I’ll let you know….. anyway…where was I?… um… Just checking the red way lines.. yup… just the normal amount.. 😀 Bye for now.. xPenx

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Queen P doesn’t have the same ring to it as Lady P, Lady P (if I may be so bold…), and I’m sure it is your keyboard and not yourself that has the crackers within (if I may be so bold yet again…)
      So, you live next door to a Bee Gee then? Fantastic! There aren’t that many celebrities that live around these parts that I know of, or there may be but I just don’t know they’re celebrities… like the ones who go into the jungle! 😉

      Like

  5. Androgoth avatar
    Androgoth

    Difi-nitly a vicked posting Aquatoom
    und tank you fir poosting it 🙂

    Glud yow enjawed tha fearworks tooooo 🙂

    Andwogof

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Heh… thanks Andwo! 😀
      The fearworks today were frightening… they sounded like someone tapping on the window… unless it was someone tapping on the window…

      Like

      1. Androgoth avatar
        Androgoth

        Sounds to me like one of those Vampy girls was trying to get your attention? 😉 And may I just say how nice it is that you have bothered to add a Poppy to your Header, that is so very thoughtful of you Aquatom, and a very nice gesture 🙂

        Have a great rest of evening and I hope
        that your leg is improving all the time 🙂 🙂

        Androgoth

        Like

        1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

          Thank you once more, Andro… I like doing different things to my header, and the poppy was something I added last year around this time, and I thought I’d do it again. I think it is just a nice reminder for remembrance, without any real need for any other words.

          Like

  6. jennygoth avatar
    jennygoth

    i wont even attempt funny writing as apparently its funny anyway a canadian blogger told me in a rude e mail that i wasnt up to his standard lol well tom i was devasted [not] hmm some people so petty so i well soy this only wince in the words of princess anne they can all naff off didnt get many fireworks here tom not like other years at last they are seeing sense that fireworks are dangerous in the wrong hands right im off to get my key board fixed lol i must have bought the same one as you xxjenb

    Like

    1. Androgoth avatar
      Androgoth

      Soime us mean too beeb 🙂 loool

      Androgoth XXXx

      Like

    2. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      How rude! Jen, naff off is a very polite response indeed!
      I’m glad to hear about your lack of fireworks – they’re still going off around here – and I hope you’ve got your keyboard back! Mine’s still causing me to laugh! 😀

      Like

  7. prenin avatar

    Hi Tom! 🙂

    Just caught your comment – it were a heavy bugger too!!! LoL!!! 🙂

    I only use Facebook because a bunch of my friends use it and they like to keep an eye on me! 🙂

    The games are a bit addictive, but the implantation of Trojans kind of ruins the fun! 😦

    Yes, I too have been pressured to Tweet, but like you I prefer my blogging friends! 🙂

    The pharmacy has screwed up my electronic paperwork after they left me without meds for a week last month.

    I was told to collect my meds on the 4th of November but with all the problems I had I got a bit side tracked and tried to get them today, but they’d lost my prescription and expected me to order my meds on the 17th, so now they are having to go back to the doctor who issued my scripts which means I have to try to get my meds tomorrow – providing they didn’t screw up again!

    Given several months of incompetence I am dreading what they’ll do next, but if they screw up even more I’m going to ask my doctor for advice – this SHOULD NOT be happening and you can bet I’m not the only one whose medication they are screwing up! 😦

    God Bless!

    Prenin.

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Prenin, it’s a bit bad when prescriptions are lost, isn’t it? I had a similar (kind of) situation the other week, but with an emergency prescription, but that was sorted on the day, luckily!
      I’ll send lighter comments to you in future… it’s this keyboard, I tell ya! 😉 (I’m sure I can feel it glaring at me…)

      Like

      1. prenin avatar

        Hi Tom! 🙂

        They didn’t just lose the prescription – that would be bad enough – the whole thing is on a computer system and last month they seriously messed up, so now THIS MONTH they are making me use up the six pill reserve I kept in case of cock-ups in order to make sure I have to accept having to take six pills one week and the rest a week later and keep me to their time table which DOUBLES the cost in taxi fares because they refuse to deliver!

        This means I run out tomorrow, but won’t get the next batch of pills until FRIDAY the 11th – one week AFTER they were supposed to!!!

        This means 24 hours without sleep unless I take a double dose of Zopiclone and then Friday I’ll be psychotic.

        All because the pharmacy are playing power games with me and are totally incompetent…

        Yeah I’m sure it’s the keyboard! LoL!!! 🙂

        Heavy Best Wishes to you my friend! 🙂

        Prenin.

        Like

        1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

          Thanks, Prenin.
          That doesn’t sound very good at all. Do you have to use that pharmacy?

          Like

  8. adeeyoyo avatar

    Aha, Tom, just wait until you get one of these ‘think’ computers. It ‘thinks’ it knows what I want to say before I do – and it’s NEVER right. I was at the end of my tether for the first couple of months. And the number of comments I had to re-do after IT DELETED them! Great post!

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Oh no, Denise, that sounds terrible… it’s like predictive text on text messaging; that always selected the wrong words for me too – I had to turn the feature off!
      And as for an automatic delete feature… no, not keen on that idea (I’d probably delete the whole blog (or even WordPress!))
      Thank you, by the way! 🙂

      Like

  9. shreejacob avatar

    I had someting inteligent to say…but it ran away at the very last minute. So instead I shall just sat that it was a great post ! And yes thought I’d leave the typos in as well…just to join in all the fun.!

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Thank you, Shree. Typos? Where?? 😉

      Like

  10. Andra Watkins avatar

    For years, I have been trying to figure out how to have Bonfire Night in America without being accused of being “one of THOSE people who just likes to set things alight.” A little bin fire might be the ticket….. 😉

    Glad the Aquatom Mansion survived the blaze.

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Thanks, Andra. We over here tend to set light to anything we can around this time of the year and people tend not to give a second glance… unless it’s a bin.
      Why not wrap up warm and throw an outdoor celebration with a little fire surrounded by chairs where everyone can sit and watch and get warm from the fire, serve a hot stew and some baked potatoes; maybe have some music in the background, and get some fireworks if you can. Folk will have so much fun that they won’t even notice that you are one of those people… I used to love the ole traditional bonfire nights. 😉

      Like

  11. blackwatertown avatar
    blackwatertown

    Binfire Night – love it – inspired.

    Like

    1. Tom (Aquatom1968) avatar

      Thank you… it did happen – exactly as typed! 😉

      Like

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