A Mansion Groans III

Fingers and The Honourable Tom (Leader of the Opposition) sat in The Chamber. Well, The Honourable Tom sat, Fingers rested by his text to speech device as only a pair of disembodied hands can.

“You really must do something about Tombie.” The Honourable Tom complained in Fingers’ general direction. “He is a health hazard. Late last night, as I was climbing up the Perpetual Staircase, I tripped over his arm, on the stairs, that he’d somehow managed to forget about. It was lucky I was near the top, but my ascent was a lot quicker than it should have been. I mean, how could he forget his arm?”

“You fgreot,” Fingers typed in his usual style, “Tbimoe is a law utno hsmielf. He vrey otfen frgteos his haed. And why do I need to do smetohnig aubot him?”

“You should take responsibility for h…” The Honourable Tom was interrupted by a blood-curdling scream that reverberated around The Chamber. It was so blood-curdling, Fingers’ left had did a triple backwards somersault in fright.

“Oh, err…” Fingers typed with his right hand, “that sonuedd like Thosamina. I wdoner what she’s dnoe now?” His left hand composed itself slightly, and both parts of the disembodied entity scuttled out of The Chamber, carrying the text to speech device on the back of his still-slightly-quivering left hand.

The Honourable Tom moaned, “But what about Tombie? We can’t leave that debate unsettled…”, but as Fingers had already left, he was talking to no-one but himself. He stood and followed Fingers to investigate what had happened to Thomasina. He slipped on Tombie’s ear on the way out and muttered, “we need to get him sorted out…” under his breath.