What a journey!

Phew!

There have been more ups and downs than a ride on a roller coaster! There have been people who have traveled quite a lot of the journey with me, and others who have accompanied me for just a part of it. I’ve seen many familiar faces along the way, some who I knew and some who I didn’t. There are also people waiting to join the ride to the next stage! And some of the sights I have seen along the way are simply breathtaking. It’s all very exciting, really!

I’m writing about my journey to get here. Right now.

I’ve written in the past about how important it is to feel good now, to enjoy our time right at this moment. The past is the past, it is done and dusted and we can’t change a thing. The future isn’t here yet, so we can imagine how we would like our future to be. We can actually determine our own future, if we so wish, but everything starts right now. Really though, everything started in the now back then.

I’m not dwelling on the past, but I am remembering each moment as though it acted like a stepping stone to bring me to today. The people who I was destined to meet in days gone by are either still in my physical life, in my memories or have moved on with wherever their lives have taken them. Some of these people may return into my life at some point in the future. Others won’t. Some people have taught me things about myself in ways, which, at the time were very painful. Others have been there for me throughout. But each and every experience I had has brought me up to this point. I can see that every experience I have had should be seen as a lesson. So, I’ve made a few mistakes along the way. I may make them again, I know that I will actually, but each time I make a mistake I learn from it, and know to try better the next time. And the next. And the next.

The places I have visited are still in my memories too. Some no longer exist in the real world, but they live on through my thoughts. And some I may be able to visit again. Some places I dream of visiting in the future. Some I will actually get to… others I won’t. Even if I don’t travel anywhere again, I’ve been here. I can honestly say that being in a good here is a fantastic feeling indeed.

So, I haven’t done that much. So what? I’ve lived. I’ve laughed. I’ve cried. I’ve moaned. I’ve fought. I’ve learned something. I’ve taught something. I’ve helped. I’ve been helped. I’ve listened. I’ve watched. I’ve admired. I’ve been inspired. I’ve created. I’ve dreamt. I’ve played. I’ve been to both hell and back and to every corner of the vastness of my own imagination… I’ve done more… I’ve had fun…  and I’ve got more to do!

I’m here now. What a journey! And looking ahead I can see many roads heading out into the future. I’m on one of those roads right now. The journey from my past that has brought me to here may have just ended, but the journey onwards is just about to begin. I’m going to take it one step at a time. And I’m going to ensure that I enjoy each and every step.

Random Ramblings

I keep thinking that I need to try and get some sort of structure into my blog posts. And I then think that my thoughts are not really structured in any logical way. As the blog is about me and my thoughts, it stands to reason that the blog itself should be random – and therefore without structure. Which in turn means that the blog has a structure (of some sort). It’s funny how things work out at times. Or, more to the point, how I work them out. There is a logical explanation to everything…

I’ve been catching up with a few posts on other blogs this evening, and there are some great posters out in the big wide world! I’ve added another couple to my recommendations page, and I think I will soon have to start thinking of adding a little structure there. Not just yet though… that’s a job I’ll leave until later, when I have more links on there.

That highlights one thing that I need to have a look at changing – I tend to put things off. Urgent things I do as needed, but non-urgent things can go for weeks undone. Suddenly, what was non-urgent becomes super-urgent and I wonder why I didn’t do it back when it first came to light. Still, I’ve always done things that way, so I think it is safe to say I’ll look at what I need to do to change this characteristic in due course…

On the same subject of putting things off, I shuffled my Cosmic Ordering Oracle cards earlier today, and the top card is ‘Career’. In my ‘Diary of Dynamic Differences’ posts back in September I decided that I want to change my job. Well, I’ve not really tried, I must admit. A few half hearted looks in the local newspaper and a few searches on companies on the internet have not given me the slightest nudge in the direction of where I am headed. Maybe the card is an indicator that something is now on the horizon for me. I’ll have to wait and see what will come my way with regards to that! I have had another idea for something though, but I’ll hang fire with that too, for the time being. Sometimes I wonder how I ever get anywhere…

All in all I’ve had a quiet, relaxing Sunday. Apart from shopping at lunchtime I have done nothing. Even so, the time has passed really quickly once again. Maybe I should start doing more just to slow the time down a little… I suppose it could work. That is, when I get round to doing things!

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Twenty Five things I didn’t do today

1 ) Fly.

That has been on my to do list for months, but I never get around to it for some reason. Just to soar into the skies and feel the elements on my face as I’m looking at the sprawling views would really invigorate me. Besides it rained a bit this afternoon.

2 ) Bake.

I bake a mean loaf of bread. Well, my breadmaker does, but I haven’t got around to buying the ingredients for it. Maybe tomorrow.

3 ) Write my novel.

I have started it, but I can’t actually say it is written until it is complete. So I haven’t done that.

4 ) Communicate with a goldfish.

The reason for not doing this is that I don’t actually know any goldfish. I know several cats though, and communicated with one of them today, so that’s a start.

5 ) Perform in the London Philharmonic Orchestra.

I can’t play any musical instruments, so I suppose I would always be ruled out of doing this. I wouldn’t mind learning how to play the harp though.

6 ) Meet Tom Welling.

Busy schedule. Oh, and different continents.

7 ) Get my haircut.

The barber shop I usually go to was closed as the guy who usually cuts my hair is on holiday. I got up especially early to do this too, and only found out it was closed as I read the note on the door.

8 ) Go shopping.

Doing that tomorrow. That is what you call a rock’n’roll lifestyle – shopping on a Sunday!

9 ) Download some spooky Halloween music.

No – just done that now, so I’ll add another 9 to the list.

9 ) Have a shower.

I don’t actually have a shower, so that’s why, before you go ‘ew!’ I prefer to take a bath!!!

10 ) Climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

I was going to do this after finding that my barber’s were closed, but got stuck at a red traffic light and decided to cancel this idea.

11 ) Go wing-walking with a Koala while eating a banana.

I’m not alone there, I don’t think anyone has ever done this…

12 ) Have a lie in.

Due to hair reasons.

13 ) Go to work.

Hehehe.

14 ) Write a poem.

I wasn’t in the mood.

15 ) See a rainbow.

Even with the sunshine and rain today, I didn’t see a rainbow anywhere!

16 ) Be in two places at the same time.

I know a way how to do this, but I haven’t done it today!

17 ) Sing Ave Maria in the middle of the shopping mall.

I didn’t go shopping – and I can’t sing. Well, I can, but not in the right notes.

18 ) Eat chips.

I ate a casserole.

19 ) See a show.

Shows are normally on in the evening, unless one goes in the afternoon, which I didn’t. And I haven’t got a ticket.

20 ) Cry.

I almost cried whilst watching something on TV, but I didn’t.

21 ) Tell Bernard to ‘shut up’ in a nice way.

There was no need. I’ve had a good day, even though I haven’t done much.

22 ) Buy my lottery ticket.

OH NO!!! Luckily, it was bought the other day. Phew!

23 ) Write about the effects of the Full Moon

Oops. I have now. I’ll have to add another 23.

23 ) Forgotten to do something.

At least I don’t think I’ve forgotten anything…

24 ) Visit Machu Picchu in Peru.

I’m putting this off for the time being. I will go there someday. There and Iceland (although not in the same day!)

25 ) Write a meaningful blog post.

Well, there’s plenty of time for that, isn’t there! I like to have fun every now and then!

And fun I’ll be having shortly… I’m visiting my local haunt! 🙂

 

The Full Moon

I was told today that it was a Full Moon.

I normally feel slightly different on the day of the Full or New Moon, but didn’t feel any different today. I’ve not even seen the Moon today, but replied that it must be close to the Full Moon, but it isn’t the Full Moon yet.

I can normally see subtle changes in other people around the time of the Full or New Moon, but haven’t noticed anything that different in anyone today.

I’ve just had a look at my trusty Moon Phase Calculator, and the Full Moon is tomorrow. So that explains that.

When I say I feel differently on the day of the Full Moon, I don’t become a werewolf or anything as dramatic as that, but I do feel slightly more… alert, no that’s not right… edgy, again no, that’s missing something too… receptive. Yes, receptive to a lot of things going on. I notice people’s behaviour change – not individually, but as a group. Sometimes that is a good thing, but sometimes it can also spell trouble. Well, if everyone is receptive to a lot more going on around them, some are bound to interpret what they see in the totally wrong context. I think it’s probably a good thing that I’m a little more wary around this time… In the Tarot, the Moon card can represent treachery or a warning to watch your back, or creativity, intuition and powerful magic …

I love the Full Moon. I imagine it has the power to boost any of my Cosmic Orders when I send them on the night of a Full Moon. I imagine it being my relay station to the Universe if I have something that I consider really urgent that I need to order.

I also have the utmost respect for the Power of the Full Moon. Well, it does have control over the water on the planet, and when you think about the human body being mostly water too you can start to see why people would start to behave differently, obviously not as dramatic as the tides, but different. It also adds fuel to the stories of werewolves, and how certain people become like wild animals on the night of the Full Moon.

And then there’s the mystical, magical side of the Full Moon that I mentioned earlier. A good time to cast certain spells if you like that kind of thing, but remember the Power of Threefold Return!

The Moon certainly does more than just light our paths late at night!

My Secret Identity

I like writing on here. I like the anonymity of it all. I can write about whatever I think and feel, likes and dislikes, waffle on about any old rubbish or try to write about sensible stuff. I can go from making no sense at all to making some sense about something. I can lose myself in my ideas, and put pen to paper (well, fingertips to keyboard!). I can go with the flow and see what happens, or I can think long and hard about something important I want share. I can write about my innermost secrets, share my innermost thoughts, reveal my innermost fears and describe my past endeavors. I can record my dreams. I can describe who I am without saying who I am.

Aquatom1968  is my public identity on this blog. My real identity is my secret identity. I think I have the two separate enough so if someone who knows the real me were to read my posts in this blog they wouldn’t recognise me, even though I have described some events in the past where they were present. Luckily I don’t want fame. I wouldn’t mind the fortune, but hiding behind my on-line character is as close to fame as I currently feel comfortable with. Not that Aquatom1968 is that famous either!

I did a Google search for Aquatom recently thinking I wouldn’t find anything – I was surprised. There’s loads of results… I thought I was being unique with my choice of name. That just goes to show how important it is to do research first. Luckily, again, I didn’t see any Aquatom1968s, so in that respect I’m unique! Phew!

Within my posts, I’ve dotted here and there a few clues about the real me, but the whole point of the blog was to be able to get my feelings down somewhere to learn more about me, so writing this blog has given me the opportunity to see me through another person’s eyes – or rather another persona’s eyes…

Sometimes I write as though I’m observing… sometimes I write as though I’m participating… sometimes I write as though I’m in an entirely different dimension… and sometimes I write from my imagination. All different ways to explore the real me, but written under my cunning disguise of Aquatom1968.

I write more about what I feel is important to me, so at times may repeat myself. At times I may contradict myself. At times I may look like a complete buffoon. And at times I may write something that might help someone else.

I don’t want to tell anyone what to do with their lives as I don’t really know what I want to do with mine. I write about feeling good all of the time as I feel it is important to feel good. By writing about feeling good, and the things that make me feel good, it comes full circle back to me, and it helps me to feel good again. A kind of recycled feel good feeling. Well, you can never feel too much good, can you? I write about certain aspects of my personality because I feel more comfortable about them. I’m sure in time, I’ll feel more comfortable about other aspects of my personality and be able to write about them too. There’s plenty of time for that though. There’s no point rushing anything.

Whenever I write a post in my blog, I take a copy of it and add it to a Word document I have created, so I can look for something if needed at a later date. I looked at this document last night, after adding yesterday’s post, and was surprised by the word count at the bottom. I have written more that 99,995 words (that was the figure yesterday – it will be more today!) and the document is now 100 pages long. One hundred pages! All about me. Blimey. I didn’t know I had that much in me! At school I remember thinking a one thousand word essay was a long one. Today that looks like nothing.

So, back to my secret identity. Who knows if anyone will work out my secret in the near future? How will I handle it if or when they find out? Should I have another back up identity ready just in case, or should I say “Well done, you’ve found the real me!”? I wonder if I’ll find the real me? Will I reveal snippets about any other secrets I may have?

I don’t know how Super Heroes cope with their secret identities. They are in the public eye with only the flimsiest of disguises to help to protect their secret. I have the words, the screen, and cyberspace to protect me when I’m online, and my mild mannered bumbling personality to protect me in my ‘real’ world. I somehow don’t see these two worlds colliding.

So, citizens of the world…

Stay good to yourself, and stay safe! Aquatom1968

Well, I quote other people from time to time, so why not? 😉