Day: February 2, 2018

AnimalsFeel GOOD!The WorldTime

Vampyre’s Day–what we know so far

As Vampyre’s Day draws closer, ever closer, reports are emerging of:

Love birds fighting;
Mail being intercepted by carrier pigeon;
Red roses suddenly turning black;
My true love sending only one turtle dove on the second;
Heart-shaped chocolates being made with a harsh, sharp edge;
A million love songs being replaced by an odd grunge/swing combo;
Humbug sales on the increase;
Cute Vampyre Bunnies rampaging amok, everywhere;
Weeping statues suddenly starting to smile;
The Argentine Tango now including five different Charleston steps;
Dating websites now getting a ‘swipe up’ option indicating, presumably, ‘get me off this planet’;
Seasonal card manufacturers slicing their prices by ninety per cent;
Cheese replacing oysters as a favourite aphrodisiac, due to the latter’s emerging vampiric tendencies;
The Love Bug movie being remade featuring a clapped-out tractor in the title role;
Aphrodite’s Moon, the THIRD Full Moon of January being covered by cloud, WORLDWIDE, and missed by everyone.

These developments are ongoing. Perhaps you have noticed something untoward – something not quite as it should be – taking place in the run up to Vampyre’s Day (February 14th). If so, let us know in the comments below.

Further updates will appear here as and when they come to light…