Why Me? sounds a lot better than whiney, don’t you think? But even so, don’t you let the rest of these letters turn into a major whine fest.
I know the changes in the weather and the temperatures can sometimes have a strange affect on your mood and generally how you’re feeling, but could you please clear up this feeling of swarfega I have all over me. I can’t stand up without feeling as though I’m whooshing around.
Please pull yourself together. Obviously in the last letter you meant to say vertigo and not swarfega, which as we all know is a strong hand cleaner. Although I probably would still feel as though I’m whooshing around if I did have that all over me.
Hello. Are you here already?
Dear The Police,
Thank you ever so much for returning the bicycle that was stolen from the garden. I hope justice will be served to those who committed the crime.
Dear Bike Thieves,
I hope you learn from this experience after justice has been served, and that you will change your ways, and therefore your lives. It’s actually quite amusing that the bike you attempted to steal, the one that you were filmed trying to damage in the neighbour’s garden, had actually been left out to be collected by the scrap-man.
Dear Poetic Justice,
I love you at times!
I am preparing for my return. I shall be taking a few more days out from blogging, and then I shall recommence. Even if I can’t think of anything to write, it hasn’t stopped me before so I WILL NOT let it stop me again. The break has been wonderful, by the way!
Dear Britain’s Got Talent’s Audley Buckle,
Chicken and Chips! That took a while to get out of my head, I don’t mind telling you. Although I’d best stop now, as I can feel it coming back.
Ulp! And there it is!
I’ve heard that you are planning a rather un-settled time, weather-wise. Please be advised that I shall be a chillin’ out come rain or shine, so you’ll be a gettin’ a no complainin’ from me. n.
And to finish… Dear All,
The temperatures are rising, so keep your cool. (Well, they are here in the UK!)
Thank you for reading!
P.S. Here’s a photograph of an electric butterfly, just because:
Well, they don’t really exist, but anything that fires the imagination is always useful, don’t you think?